Friendship & Love

totally from my personal point of view (ppov)..no researc, no copying..truly from what i understand,from what i've gone through, from the bottom of my heart..

Friendship
something thta is truly precious.what can u do without friends? wherever we go, or at least i go, i need a friend. i need to know, at least there will be one single person that i know or comfortable with. yes, family is important. family is everything.that's unspoken rule.nothing in the world can ever replaced that, not even the most perfect friend. but still, friend is important. to tell me that life will still move on no matter what happen. to tell me that i look ok. to tell me that i'll be ok. to praise me.to criticize on me.to be mad at me when i'm not at my best.to tell me to go home when i still spend my late hours at the ofis. to bark me to the clinic when i'm sick.u know all those things that my parents will not be bother of doing. nope, don't get me wrong. i love my parent.divine and undivided love. but i was raised not to be dependent on them. i can't share so many things with them.there are times, i can't even tell them that i'm not feeling well because..(let me be the only person who know the reason)..not until i can't raise from my bed or fainted, i should still move on - for them. so that's why i seek for friend. i love having a lot friends but i prefer to have one person that i will find first when i'm not ok and need a shoulder to cry on. i don't mind being with a bunch of friends but at most time i need one person that is really steady, know me better than anyone else, know exactly when to be mad or gentle to me. and no matter what i did to her/him this person will not mind because they know me perfectly well. i just need this person to be someone that i can trust. that's all.
along my journey, i've found a lot of this type of friends. whom i know will do everything for me. who will even kiss me goodnite when my nite was terribly bad. who would go and knock at the jerk's door in the middle of the nite to give their piece of mind for hurting me so much. who would cry when they can't come and visit me at the boarding schools. yes, i've found them at various places that i've been and i'm so lucky that i still have them so close to my heart even their physical is 100 miles out of sight. and i believe i will find a lot more as this journey continues..

Love
the first time i really really like someone was when i was 16. love at the first sight, as they call it.he never knew how much i like him as i never told him until we finished school. i've never even talked to him. looking back at that, i don't think it's even considered love. (smile)but yes that add up some spice during my school years. the first time i fall in love at the end of 2005. that's how i understand how falling head over heals ever exist. the love bring me somewhere that i've never been before, bringing something out from me that i don't even know i possesed. it taught me that love is not all about what u get, but what u give. love means trust. love means being patient. loves me loved. it's not all about u, forget about u in a while and u will see the love. by then, i never knew love is that fascinating. but, there is one problem. i fall in love with a wrong person. i gave it all to a jerk.i wasted 1 year 7 months spending my life with him and another a few months after that mourning his gone. looking back, the 1 year 7 months are not that wasting. i've learnt so much.SO MUCH. but the mourning-i should have known better bu never mind, time passed and i'm over all that. i knew how bad he is now and never in 1000 years will i take him back. but i also know how to love better..

will this 2 come together..? i don't know. am i falling in love now..?i don't think so.i'mtrying to savage a friendship that i love so much, that's for sure. but it seems that i'm going no where. whatever i do bring me back where i begin.
at the moment, i don't know what i want. and as i always said, i only wish that things will come back the way it used to be.